The Uniform

See this puppy? Aside from needing to be pressed, I’ve discovered that it wields great power. I didn’t dig it that much when the Cub Master handed it to me. In fact, I didn’t like it at all. I thought, “Man, the sacrifices I make for The Kid.” Polyester khaki just isn’t that attractive. And I’m already fighting a losing battle of not looking the ayi/nanny/housekeeper part.

Imagine my surprise when I found out that The Uniform garners tremendous respect. That’s right, cue Aretha. R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me…

Here’s how I arrived at this conclusion:

Clue number one: During the second Den meeting, our driver Mr. Smith told me, “That really is a very good looking uniform.” Followed by an enthusiastic, “You really do wear it so well.” I laughed and later told The Hubs, I think our driver is a little turned on by this uniform. But then again, Mr. Smith is a devoted Chinese patriot who worships his Chinese military.

Clue number two: After our Scout Pack Meeting on Saturday, we headed to the food court. As I walked through the shopping plaza with husband and Circus in tow, I noticed people turning and staring. I assumed it was the usual, oh look, three-kids-and-a-Caucasian stare. But, no. As I walked ahead, I noticed people turning to stare directly at me. No, not at me…at The Uniform.

Clue number three: When I asked Mr. Smith about the stares, he explained that it’s rare to see a woman in uniform, so I must be very high ranking in my group. And since my patches are Shanghai 88 and the American flag, I must have received very elite training. Knot tying, anyone?

Sweet. Like Spiderman’s web-slinging suit or Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak, The Uniform has tremendous power. I should buy ten of these and wear them every.single.day. It’s better than being treated like the nanny.

I’ve decided that I look fantastic in polyester khaki.

8 thoughts on “The Uniform

  1. you should add a few of those merit badges and pin a few medallions too…miss you circus mom! we’ve been trying to skype – L has been given the cookie-monster stethoscope in prep for her 2year well-child visit today! xo

  2. I love it! As I was reading I thought “What a sweet tender mercy from our Heavenly Father.” Here is something you really didn’t want to do, but signed up anyway, and now are garnering more respect from the people of China. God truly does know all and gently guides us along.

  3. Attention CM.
    To paraphrase the Borg (Star Trek) change is inevitable, therefore one has to adapt to survive! You are doing very well !!

  4. I think you look fabulous in khaki! Way to support the kid and gain some respect at the same time! You’re awesome super mom!

  5. Hello! You have a Shanghai, China boy scout uniform? That’s frickin’ awesome. Save that one in your closet.

    I still have my Frankfurt International School 1989 school jacket from when I lived in Germany.

  6. I guess things really do happen for a reason! I for one love Khaki polyester and you wear it like a rockstar…..and now everyone can see what a rockstar you are!

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